Why Aren't I More Disciplined?

Why is creativity so electrifyingly appealing and so difficult to comply with?

By Jill Badonsky, MEd | Updated February 17, 2019

Dear Muse,

On Tuesday, I opened my Word program to a blank page and started writing my next book with the flow of a cascading stream of enlightened creative genius.

Okay, no, that’s not right. I did not do that … at all.

I confess. I did this: I opened a page to write a book and then, as if my free will was captive to some wicked robotic force, I compulsively clicked on Facebook to post a status report.

And since I was there, I clicked on a few of my “friends’’ pages and “liked” five to twenty-seven of their posts, and in compliance with perceived unspoken expectations, commented on three of them.

And then for some reason I wondered how old Renee Russo was so clicked over to IMDB to see, clicked back to FB to check if anyone liked my status report, flipped over to the Animal Rescue site to help feed the animals and while there ordered a paw print t-shirt, which reminded me that I should donate to a dancer starting her own company in Philadelphia, so clicked on Paypal to do that, petted my cat who was pawing my leg, noticed my wind-up duck sitting there motionless — winded and watched, checked to see if anyone liked my three-word response, then felt the need to rest my eyes. So I flipped back to the page I opened to write my book because a blank sheet of paper is really, so soothing to the eyes.

By this time it was noon.

THIS IS MADNESS. Why aren’t I more disciplined? Why is creativity both so electrifyingly appealing and so difficult to comply with? —Frustrated Creativity Seeker

Hey There Frustrated Creativity Seeker,

Dear Muse Here’s your diagnosis: Human in the twenty-first century.

Don’t feel like the Lone Ranger — the numbers of distracted creativity seekers is growing in crazy epidemic proportions like a monster banana tree out of control.

Here’s what’s going on: Since the advent of instant gratification related to the amount of information we now have at our fingertips, our mind has been inadvertently programmed to boing from thing to thing.

You may have developed a full-blown gravitation toward bouncing to what’s easiest. As much as the creative process is a seductive temptress, once we begin to dance with her, the moves become uncertain, fears kick-up, we compare ourselves to others and it’s not as easy as we thought. So we often cope by getting sucked into the vortex behind the looking-glass computer-screen.

If instant gratification isn’t enough to complicate matters, we have come to adopt unrealistic expectations, overwhelming feelings of too much and not knowing where to start, resistance born of not feeling deserving, diets that fuzz our brains, and downright rebellion to our own intentions.

This Dear Muse Column is on a mission to help you solve your mysterious frustrations one tiny step at a time, the Kaizen-Muse™ way. So your first tiny step is two simple questions that do not require an immediate answer, just patiently ask them and allow your sub-conscious to percolate:

What would make it easier for me to show-up?
What worked in the past?

Be prepared to receive answers that will be delivered as if out of nowhere.

Be ready to create.

Instigating Brilliance,
—Your Muse

Next: Are You Creative? Quiz

[an error occurred while processing this directive]

KMCC Stories

Are You Creative? Quiz

Are You Your Audience?

Finding Your Own Audience